Let me also start this blog by saying there is a significant amount of guilt that I feel. Trust me, there is always a part of me that will wonder if I made the right call, the right decision...honestly which happens all the time. It's not news when I say that moms can be SO opinionated. Moms can think there is only one way to do things...theirs. Moms will turn their nose up because you aren't doing it the way society says, you know, the way other good moms do things. You must be a terrible mom if you are different.
At church the other week, they shared this viral quote, and I couldn't agree more:
How to be a parent in 2017:
Make sure your children's academic, emotional, psychological, mental, spiritual, physical, nutritional, and social needs are met while being careful not to overstimulate, understimulate, improperly medicate, helicopter, or neglect them in a screen-free, processed foods-free, GMO-free, negative energy-free, plastic-free, body positive, socially conscious, egalitarian but also authoritative, nurturing but fostering of independence, gentle but not overly permissive, pesticide-free two-story, multilingual home, preferably in a cul-de-sac with a backyard and 1.5 siblings spaced at least two years apart for proper development, also don't forget the coconut oil.
How to be a parent in literally every generation before ours:
Feed them sometimes.
Seriously guys, parenting is hard. Making the right call is hard. The pressure is real. So give me some grace as you read this, please.
We have been visiting the doctor for almost two months now on feeding issues. No matter what I had tried to this point, Madelynn was still screaming during feeding, her tummy hurting and upset, and vomiting at least a few times a day. She had been on two different reflux medications, which I felt were helping, but it seemed like it would only be a few days and then we'd be back to square one.
So they told me to start looking at my diet and see what she might be sensitive to, so I did. They recommended eliminating dairy, so I did. I waited two weeks, and no change, still screaming, still in pain. They recommended limiting caffeine, so I did. No change. They recommended limiting spicy foods, so I did. No change. They recommended eliminating all cow protein, no steak, no ground beef, bye bye tacos and queso. And I did that. Another two weeks pass and it still....didn't...change anything. All of this took place over almost two months of screaming, crying, awful feedings where she'd barely eat.
So last week, the doctor told me maybe it might not be a bad idea to try to do a hypoallergenic formula for especially sensitive tummies. I told them there was no way that formula could be better for her than my milk, because, science and nature. I told them we just needed to switch up her reflux meds again, that we could try that again...but they told me just to give it a try and see what happened.
So I gave my baby formula. The first feed, this happened:
My girl had finally stopped crying. Now that we knew the problem was something she was sensitive to in my diet, I could have spent another two months or more eliminating one food, waiting a week or two, and seeing if that was it. Or...I could give her hypoallergenic formula, and she would eat....and be full...and...gasp...happy!
I have very minimal guilt with this choice....there's always a tiny part of me which will say I should have tried more. But then again, the other part of me says let her lead me, I'm not in charge, and she not crying when she's eating anymore!
And then my wonderful best friend sent me this as a reminder and I immediately remember my four year old who will only eat chicken nuggets...
I'm trying my hardest to remember this. It's just a moment in time. If this was another mommy who decided to formula feed, I would seriously high five her, have zero judgement, because I personally believe everyone does what works best for them. But when it comes to myself, I'm a little (a lot) harder on myself (can I get an amen ladies). Anyway, so that's the update. My girl eats now. And she's happy. And gaining weight. And it's ok. She's going to be a hypoallergenic formula fed baby.
Also very ironically she was milk for Halloween, and I was cheese...both dairy things she can't handle lol.
Have a good week, friends! Stay happy, healthy, and eat lots of queso and tacos in celebration with me.
